Just when you think... A MUST READ!

I love roller coasters. The thrill, the excitement, the speed. However, the roller coaster our family has been on these past few weeks is one I am ready to get off! Late last night I found out our home was officially on the market. I knew it was going to be on the market soon, I just didn't realize it was ALREADY on the market.  As I looked around my messy house, I wondered how in the world I was going to have time to clean it in case someone wanted to see it. Nick had been home alone with the kids and it looked like a tornado went through it. The stress overwhelmed me and I broke down. This is too much for me!

It wasn't just the messy house, but the thoughts of leaving such a good thing we have here; the neighborhood, Crooked Lake Elementary where I work and the kids go to school, the family, the friends, the LIFE we have here in MN. I told God that the only way I was going to be able to pull through this move was with His help. In tears I went to prayer and journaled everything I felt and needed to have happen. It says in the Bible to let your requests be made known to God. I wrote down a nice long list of all of the things God needed to take care of. I also had to ask God to keep my heart soft for Nick. Knowing that Colorado was where we needed to go for school made it a right decision. Yet, the reality of moving is easier said than done. I didn't want to become bitter and resentful; especially when I know Nick needs to finish Bible school.

But what about the rest of us? Knowing we have to sell our house and open our home for strangers to walk in bothers me. My home is my sanctuary. I don't want anyone coming in here and making judgments about it. What about the kids? My daughter Sutton cries almost every night in thoughts about moving. Brendan our oldest doesn't mind. Little does he know Bantam traveling hockey in Colorado costs $10-12 THOUSAND dollars a season.!! We cannot afford that. He would be CRUSHED if he found out he couldn't play hockey anymore. Then he would be angry that God moved our family. Would he understand it was for the best or would he be bitter at God for taking away something he loves so much?

As I went to bed last night, I was still hurting. I still had faith though that God would make things right and that I just needed to trust Him. God had my life in his hands because Lord knows I felt like I lost control of it.

Sure enough, this morning Nick wakes me up with, "Tam, I know you aren't going to like this, but someone is coming over in a bit to see the house." Now I will be completely honest here. You have to know I thought, Are you kidding me?! My house is a disaster! I hate you, Nick.

WOW! Such strong words. I was losing it. 'Hate' is a swear word in our home and for me to express those words, even in my head, shocked me. I felt bad for even thinking it. Yet, this is where I was at. The next hour and a half I spent frantically picking my house up. I was thankful I didn't have to go to school till later in the morning so I had time to clean. 15 minutes before I had to be at work, I quickly gave myself a diaper wipe bath (because you know I was sweaty) and got dressed. No breakfast, barely some make-up, and I had to go. Anymore mornings like that I will have to go to marital counseling.

Now here is where the story gets good. Abraham in the Bible was told to sacrifice his son Isaac. Abraham didn't want to do it, but out of obedience, was about to offer up his son as a sacrifice. Last night and this morning I have felt like Abraham. My life and the life of my kids was about to be sacrificed out of obedience. Then Nick called me at work.

"Tammy, you will never believe this. Pastor Steve (a neighbor) came over just after the showing and handed me this flyer. It said, 'The wait is over!

Charis Bible College in Minneapolis, MN in 2012!"

As my heads stops spinning, I can feel myself begin to cry. Was this my answer to my prayers?! This is the school Nick was planning on attending this Fall! The whole reason for our move was for him to go to school. Oh my gosh, PRAISE THE LORD! We were just about to sell our home, pull our kids out of school, uproot everything we have here, and leave. Just like Abraham with his hand raised high above Isaac ready to kill him, God provides a ram last second to use as a sacrifice. Isaac was spared and so were we.

You have to know that the idea of Colorado excited us. The reality of leaving is what stole my joy. I kept imaging my kids having to walk into a new school and hating it. Then having to wipe their tears and tell them this was God's will for our family. What a nightmare. I can't say that is what would have happened for sure. But the thoughts kept crossing my mind.

I need to give God far more credit in knowing that where we are, there He is also. The kids may have disliked their first few days of school in Colorado, but eventually would have made friends and all would be well. Either way, I guess we will never know.

The phone call I received at school was short. I hopped in my car and drove the 1 minute it took for me to get home. Nick was in the driveway waiting for me. Needless to say, I ended up melting in his arms. Nick is overjoyed to see how God is providing for all of the needs in our family. The kids will continue to excel in all they do, I will continue to teach at their school, and Nick will be able to go to Bible school; in MINNESOTA.